los angeles
amidst the increasingly tenuous hold on peace in our modern world, a young man is attempting to begin a revolution of his own- through comedy. bradley clarke, a film student at biola university and creator of the late night comedy television show LATE, believes that just as a soft answer turns away wrath, so a snide remark will turn away hezbollah.
according to mr. clarke, the best way to defeat an enemy is merely to ignore his existence. "it's like when you were a little kid and your babysitter kept you in your room with threats of the boogeyman. as soon as i figured out the boogeyman couldn't get me because he didn't exist, i had all the cookies after 8.30 pm that i wanted! thanks to our postmodern understanding that things are only true because everyone else around us says it’s true, if all my friends and i decided that the terrorists didn’t exist, we’d get off scott free! i mean, once peter pan and tinkerbell convinced wendy and her brothers they could fly, there was no problem. a simple case of mind over matter. and laws of physics.”
in further consideration of mr. clarke’s remarks, we find that his logic is incontrovertible. let us be the first to tell you not to worry about terrorists. also, it would probably be a great idea to invest in LATE, because its value is bound to increase exponentially in the immediate future. everyone knows it.
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